Funny Hull
Halloween at My Brother’s
30 Apr 2009
It was Halloween 2004. I went along with my missus to a party at my brother's house, where we dressed like monsters, witches and pillocks along with some of my brother's friends and work colleagues.
Much alcohol was consumed, which was helping break the ice amongst those of that didn't know each other. With a combination of lager and childish glee, my brother and I concocted some "scary Halloween games" for a bit of fun.
I know how lame these sounds, though please bare with me; it's about to get lamer!
In the spooky glow of candlelight I told the chilling tale of Mary Worth, AKA Bloody Mary; a child-murderer who lived off Holderness Road, East Hull; coincidently this was in close proximity to the very house we were in.
We suggested that it'd be a marvelous idea to use the traditional method to summon her. Why not? We would all go one-by-one, into the bathroom by candlelight, face the mirror and repeat thirteen times "I don't believe in Mary Worth". This was done in the ‘hope' that the lovely Mary would appear, and then leap out from the mirror to scratch out our eyes, steal of souls, give us a lap dance, etc.
And so it was that, one by one we filed off to face this spooky challenge.
Now here comes the lamest part. My brother and I thought it would be hilarious to scare the crap out of someone. Following some masterful work of distraction and confusion, we were able to position my brother in the bathroom, concealed behind a shower curtain. The next person to go in would call upon Mary Worth only to then have him dive upon them through the shower curtain dressed as the devil; we'd then laugh and congratulate ourselves on how zany we were.
We'd previously decided which of his work colleagues we'd target; a bloke he knew fairly well and that could take a joke.
As he strode forward for his turn in the spooky bathroom he was stopped by wife who was eager to go next. Worried that our "hilarious prank" would go awry I ear wigged this interruption and gathered that she was eager to go next as she "needed the toilet".
Clearly at this point I had the opportunity to stop this going any further. So, I did the honourable thing and watched on with great amusement as she took the candle and headed toward the spooky bathroom.
With childlike glee I shared with the others at the party, including the girl's husband that my brother was like a coiled spring ready to attack. We quickly agreed, with collective childlike glee that we would gather outside the bathroom door to see how things would unfold.
A couple of minutes passed and eventually we were rewarded with the sound of my brother crashing through the shower curtain taking her down to the bathroom floor. She scrambled to unlock the door shrieking in fear. As she emerged she screamed as she found us crowded outside the door, and then shrieked again as she realised what had happened.
My brother emerged, and took of his mask smiling sheepishly. As we stood there, the smell of her freshly laid poo began to emanate from the bathroom. We all did our best to repress our childlike glee.
Ghostly child killers and Satan diving on top of her aside, the girl was most freaked out by the realisation that whilst she'd nipped to the toilet to empty her bowels, her husband's colleague had been secretly watching only three feet away in his sordid hiding place.
Since then my brother's Halloween Parties have become an annual thing, though I reckon there's more chance of Mary Worth turning up than that poor lass. Personally, I think she over reacted; at least my brother waited until she had pulled her knickers up.
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