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Source: http://www.maximumlies.co.uk

After much analysis of the content of BBC programming and deliberation of license fee value, the BBC has announced that from August 1st the legendary entertainer Basil Brush will anchor the prestigious 6 o'clock news bulletin.

'We've tried to pin down what the British Public want', BBC News Editor John Tealady-face has told Maximumlies, 'and we've found they want Basil Brush.'

Basil Brush begin a successful television career in the 1960's, appearing on the hugely popular 'Give a nobody a chance show' as a witty magician with a novelty side-kick 'Mr Derek' dressed as Jesus.

Brush has been credited as being solely responsible for the 1970's explosion of experimental 'psycho-animal programming(tm)'. Acts like Emu, Orville and Bagpuss would have never had opportunity to flourish without Basil opening doors at the BBC.

Basil, however, outperformed his newly found competition and made himself a household name across the globe. Indeed, at the height of his power he performed for the Queen at the Royal Variety Performance (he performed the whole night with no-one else allowed on stage on that particular year), won the Wimbledon Tennis Tournament in 1976 and gave the idea for Star Wars to George Lucas.

Not bad for a fox that had been performing magic along with side-kick 'Mr Derek the bearded Jesus man' only ten years earlier.

Apart from a short spell as Doctor Who, Basil has enjoyed a semi-retirement in recent years. However the chance to bask in the limelight once more appears to have awakened this legendary TV persona once more;

'The 6 o'clock news will be the pinnacle of my career. A sparkling jewel of entertainment in an otherwise bland media world and Mr Derek might even be back to do the Weather!

'We'll cover all the current world events and what's even better is I'll be able to use my catchphrase virtually all the time, what with all the trouble in the world.'

'Eh, get it? BOOM BOOM!'

Sounds great Basil. Just what the News-Doctor ordered.

Source: http://www.maximumlies.co.uk