Funny News
Mermaid brings A63 to standstill
23 Jul 2010
Frustrated motorists were today left stranded when a lorry transporting the world's only living mermaid to international tourist attraction The Deep overturned on its way into Hull.
Pound-hungry bosses at the celebrated aquarium were quick to offer the stranded fish-girl a home after she was washed ashore along the Cornish coastline. Tragedy struck however when the vehicle carrying the flippered babe jack-knifed, throwing the terrified nymph out of her tank and, according to one eye witness, across both lanes of the dual carriageway "like a wet turd on an ice rink".
First on the scene was Traffic Cop Gareth Liverspot. "I could smell her before I could see her," he said. "Fifty, a hundred yards away. It didn't help that she was flapping about, choking to death while wafting her stench around."
Mermaids - similar to ‘'sirens" - are well known for luring randy sailors to their death. "I didn't know about that siren stuff," claimed PC Liverspot. "But I could feel myself becoming sexually aroused as I approached the accident. By the time I was coning off the outbound lane I had the most inappropriate erection since Princess Diana's funeral."
Dr David Essex, Marine Biologist at The Deep, said: "It's a great shame that we'll now be unable to study this fascinating anomaly of nature. This specimen is of great importance to the continued debate around the evolution of the oceans and their extended environment. From observing her daily habits - feeding, resting, swimming - experts would have been able to draw a comprehensive picture of how this maritime "missing link" might have survived in her natural habitat."
He added: "I was also rather hoping I might give her one."
Source: http://www.hulltheotherone.com/news/environment/40-mermaid-brings-a63-to-standstill.html
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